[No. 1] Getting Past the Past Takes Wanting to Heal Your Broken Heart

[No. 1] Getting past the past : takes wanting to heal your broken heart.

We’ve all done it—put on dramatically sad songs and wallowed in the pain we are left with after someone breaks our heart (shatters it, puts it through a paper shredder, you know what I mean). When I finally pulled myself out of that depressing rut, I felt intense anger, almost hate. Nah, who am I kidding; it was certainly hate. But we all know hate is similar to drinking poison and hoping the other person is affected. After months (maybe years?) of moping around, I had to snap out of it. Nothing was going to get better until I stopped playing the victim and started taking action. How did I do that? Prayer.

Prayer is not like a new outfit or a new hairdo, where you feel great on one layer, but then it quickly fades. It’s not like a promotion, where your pride and busyness briefly bandage the feelings you don’t want to address. It’s not like traveling, which heals you deeper with every new experience, but takes you away from everyday life. Prayer is aggressive in bringing out deeply suppressed emotions, here and now. It shines a brilliant light on those words that are floating in the back of your mind. It’s messy, responsive, soul saving & has the ability to heal you beyond belief. It may not change the other person, but it will certainly change you.

You simply cannot wish well for someone for an extended period of time while you are harboring hate. I would sit at home for what seemed like hours, dwelling on the hurt he had caused me…and that got me nowhere. When I had the mindfulness to refocus my mind every time I thought of him, and instead choose to pray to my God for him (yes, I thought I was crazy too), that’s when the true healing began. Don’t get me wrong; I think it’s great to take care of yourself, work hard, and explore the world. But at the end of the day, we can’t stick a bandage over, avoid, or run away from heartbreak if we want to heal our broken heart.

Getting harder and more cynical only affects your ability to love again in the future. We have to heal our hearts in a way that makes us stronger but not harder. Need help on how to pray? Drop me a comment below; I’d be happy to help.

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  1. Forgive me now if this comment gets too long, I tend to ramble when I talk of this subject lol However, I’ve been hurt in my past and in result have put a halt to dating and even talking to men now. I do want love, I want marriage, a family, my soulmate to be quite honest. I’m telling myself that I’m waiting for God to put me into a relationship He knows will be good to me but whenever I so much as think a guy is interested in me I freeze up and call quits on him. I do try to pray about this problem of mine but maybe I’m not praying the right way? How do you even start to pray for something like this? I feel like I should pray for myself to learn how to pray better before I start praying for someone else but that feels selfish so I just get stuck

    • Hey girl! Thanks for your comment and honesty. I’m sorry you’ve been hurt in your past. My question to you, why do you freeze up and call it quits? Is it because you don’t trust that this could be the right relationship? Or is it because you are scared if it is? Either way, I’d pray along the lines of asking God for courage to be open to whomever he has in store. It is so scary getting back into the dating world, but when we ask, we’ve gotta know he’s listening! And your future MR. may not seem like he is from the get-go, but you’ll never know unless you tell fear to back off! I hope that your next dating experiences leave fear and worry behind. I’ll be praying for you lady!


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